The Royal

We went to the Royal Winter Fair yesterday. I was keen on seeing what mileage I could get out of Lola.I also like to see the cows and horses and talk to them if I can. Heinrich came along for the ride I guess as he never says what he likes or dislikes. I paid for most of it so that made him happy and he had a big shawarma plate for lunch which made him happier still.
The place was the usual madhouse with busloads of screaming kids tearing around. There was the pungeant smell of poo over all which added to the ambiance. Some of the wee ones had their jackets wrapped around their noses and their little eyes were all teary. Well, when you live in the city country smells can be a tad much.
I had a nice chat with a lovely Holstein who seemed tired of it all. Cows are the nosiest four leggeds around but this one just put her head down and wished I would go away. She had a headache.
There was a young man in a white uniform carrying a blue bucket that he was using to catch poo. He would watch for a tail lifting then sprint to hold his bucket under the cow's arse chatting over his shoulder all the while to a friend.What a job! And all in white!! I was impressed.
The horses were in seclusion in their stalls with the blue curtains drawn. Too much for their nerves I guess. The ponies were in the ring with their little girl owners some of them very small indeed.The owners, not the ponies.
Lola managed not too badly but she is aching now. I guess it was a stall too far.

Oi Wish Oi Knew...

Well Oi and the Missus as bin feelin a bit rheumaticky these past few winters. The damp loik gets into the marra and them bones do ache. Well to stop the moitherin we are set to make a move. Much as it brings grief to moi eart to say goodboy to moi liddle maids oi as to do it. We are heading to foreign parts Mother and oi. Torquay to be precise. We as sold our farm and are eading out to where they as palm trees and warm winds. We as a little bungalow near the arbour where we can see them sailboats and talk to the fisher folk though how oi can make ead nor tail of what they says oi dunno. That's the problem with they foreign parts they don't speak English!
But Mother an oi shall make the best of it, we always do.They as noice pubs and good beer and we shall learn the lingo in toime.
We ad a roight toime of it clearing out the muddle in the ouse. Give me a mucky cow stall anyday! Mother is an oarder and sentimental to boot. Oi as ad a few rough days but she as seen the loight and the Oxfam shop as been appy to ave our boxes. Mother ad her tears over that as oi shall ave over the loss of moi liddle maids. Loik family they are! Annabelle, Maisy, Molly, Juno,
Buttercup an Fruitcake will not be forgotten! As if oi could forget they.They as moi eart!
A few short weeks to go an Mother an oi will ave all the toime in the world an nary a care to our earts other than where shall we stroll next. Oi as to say oi as moi misgivings about being a townie with money in moi pocket an toime on moi ands but we will give it a whirl. Oi will wroite again after the move and tell you how we gets on.