"Easy Peasy" Says Jamie.

I have been watching the Cooking Channel a lot lately. I should have said the Food Channel but in reality it is about cooking. When you cannot eat what you want to eat then the next best thing I think is to look at food or even smell it and that seems to take the edge off not having it in your mouth. Back to the Food Channel, where I have been watching the likes of Jamey Oliver and Nigella and that skinny Canadian woman who zips around cooking lovely French things. I have made the beef stew she cooked and it truly was a lovely thing. I ate two helpings and I don't like stew. Yesterday Jamie was making meaty potatoey things in his stone oven. My two companions were drooling over the pork roast when I suggested we have that for dinner one Sunday. There was instant agreement especially that I would cook it and they would eat it. One of them said this would be ideal as I like to cook [unsaid being that he liked to eat.] Well I do like to cook but having done it all on my own for these last forty years the whole thing is beginning to lose its lustre. Which is why the cooking shows seem to come into their own. I can enjoy someone else cooking a meal for me and though I don't get to eat it I still enjoy the effort they have put into it. It isn't the same going out for a meal. That is done for the money and the wait staff don't give a monkey's whether you like the nosh or not, at least not at the places I get taken to. I think the ideal would be to have one's own private cook so that recipes could be discussed along with menu planning and shopping and then to wander in and out of the kitchen enjoying sights and smells and having the plate parked in front of you would be a fine thing. Sort of like being a husband of the old school. I have one, you can ask him. Ah well roll on the Lotto, you just never know what is around the corner.

The Face on the Barroom Floor 2

The self portrait is coming along. I won't say nicely because it is anything but. There is a certain likeness but I am more interested in an impression than a repo. There is a lot of chatter where I paint and I am now used to being solitary and find the noise a real distraction. I used to like working alongside other people but not anymore it seems. We are all labouring away on portraits in various media, some of us more skilled than others. Next project if and when I finish this will be a landscape though there is talk of a sculpture class in the New Year. This is not much of a tale as there is nothing much to report but hope for better things next time. Love to you all.

Love, Love Me Do !

I have been thinking about love the past few weeks. Not the hot off the press type love and not the Steady Eddy kind of love where he forgets to put gas in the car and you mutter and mumble a bit but you still do the laundry. As opposed to either shredding his shirts or washing them with a red sock you bought off a stall . Those of you who still have stars in your eyes will think this a bit much but your day will come. I am talking about the love that dare not speak it's name [ I can hear that ! }. Self love, silly, the one thing we think we are all good at. We are not . We are all dismal failures at loving ourselves for many reasons. I am not interested in the reasons but in turning this lack in our lives around. I mean of course my own life as I am not thank goodness in charge of anybody elses.
This was made apparent to me when I read that people develop long illnesses at the end of their lives in order to learn to accept love. If you are sick and need help you will accept it with gratitude and thanks or you will be fighting still to control the situation. Even the nicest people will insist on giving rather than receiving but it is in the getting from the Universe that we are given what we need, in order to give back. How this is done I don't yet know but I think it is enough to be aware of the situation and to see what presents itself as a chance to make changes. Of course the danger lies that if this theory is true then as soon as you learn to love yourself you will be hit by a bus and so spared the lengthy illness. This will not be happening to me anytime soon! There will be many future Blogs to alarm and dismay you. God willing and the creeks don't rise.

Sensibly Shod

I watched a young woman stride down the parking lot of Canadian Tire the other day in what Princess Diana used to call "Tart's Trotters". She seemed very aware of the attention she was attracting as there were a number of men around. It was Canadian Tire after all. Maybe that's why she wore them. The men were having their thoughts and I was having mine. I can't speak for the men but I can guess. I was remembering the days when it was the norm to stuff your poor feet into sky high stilettoes and go prancing off to work as if you had never heard of an Achilles tendon, which you hadn't. By night time your feet were in agony not to mention one's back but you looked good and that was all that mattered. Somewhere over the last thirty years there has been a shift, [ thank goodness and the feminist movement] and women are now all about what looks good and what is also comfortable. There are no longer impossible standards of dress where one miserable tight, scratchy or downright unhealthy style was for eveyone whether you had a waist or not. Or worse still a pair of what my Dad used to call Queen Anne legs, [ when he wasn't being ruder] and skirts were short. I remember going to school with snowpants pulled up under a skirt and the snowjacket bunched over the top all because somewhere God said girls must not wear pants to school, or anywhere else for that matter. Heaven's , they might want to run around and have fun like the boys and then where would we be? Life is a lot more comfortable now and it really was a shock to see a woman in a pair of heels doing her shopping. I feel like she is turning her back on a hard won victory but we do live in a democracy after all. I hope she gets blisters !

The Face on the Bar Room Floor

The last blog must have touched a nerve as there were three comments, a record for me. All to do with self portraits and the horror of it all. My masterpiece is delayed as on the day I was to start it I had to send my large canvases down to number one child who is fluffing her house so it can be sold. I hope to make a start this Friday but am laid low with a very nasty sinus, chest thing that is going the rounds. I don't want to be hacking and sneezing over my fellow artists . It is a small studio and we sit cheek by jowl and share everything ! Besides to hear the comments one never seems to come off looking one's best in a self portrait and the odds are definitely stacked against me right now. I feel like I should cover the mirrors as the Jews do when they sit Shiva and mourn the dead. Not that I plan to pop my clogs anytime soon it's just when I am ill I give that impression. Perhaps I am looking at this from the wrong angle. Maybe looking like death warmed over and scraped around the frying pan will give the portrait a veracity that looking my best would not, a sort of portrait noir ! Maybe this is my breakthrough ! Maybe I am running a temperature and should go and lie down ! A short Blog but a merry one !

" La Meduse ! La Meduse ! "

I hope that is how the title is spelled. French and I have a very passing acquaintance. " La Meduse!" was what a French friend of mine used to shriek when she saw herself in a mirror. We were all quite taken with it and it could be heard around the house for a number of years until the last female child left the nest. It popped into my head the other day when I had a quick glance into a mirror to make sure I wasn't wearing any of my lunch. That is what happens when you are alone for great rafts of time and tend to read while you eat. The mirror is my little friend in that respect but gosh ! Talk about Medusa ! Normally the sight of my face is just the sight of my face but perhaps it was the light that day. Whatever it was it brought to mind Johanne's shrieks of La Meduse. Now this could be a problem as I am starting work on a self portrait at the atelier where I study the human form once a week and usually wish I didn't as it is a very dry course full of measuring and other non artistic stuff. I find that I am bored to my back teeth but plod on anyway in the hope I may learn something. That's when the idea of a self portrait struck. Next week we start with a sketch and the week after that the painting begins. Now I can't get the idea of the Medusa out of my mind. Could it be the promptings of the Muse ? Could it be the thought of staring at my own mug for hours on end ? Who knows, but be sure I will let you know how it progresses. I can be accused of many things and often am but vanity is not one of them.

The Garden is Always With Us

I have given in to temptation and hired some help with the garden. I tore a tendon in my shoulder a few weeks ago and an old leg injury from years before has flared up just when I need to be out there with spade and rake. This seemed to be a sign to me to back off from the garden and let someone with more muscle power at it. So now we have Joel out there working away and seeming to enjoy himself; well he keeps showing up. He's bringing order to my little chaotic corner of the Universe. I feed him well and keep him supplied with cups of tea and so far so good. The time appears to be right to forgo the lure of vegetables and their high maintenance ways and turn to flowers instead. The neighbours will thank me when they realize the curse of the unwanted zucchini is over. I may give in to temptation and scoot a few tomatoes among the lavender beds as there is nothing like a fresh tomato, unless it is a new potato or some fresh sauteed rainbow chard. This could get out of hand ! Be firm I tell myself. Think of the bouquets to be cut in summer. Think of the time not spent watering and weeding. Think of fresh tomatoes !!! Discipline was never my forte. As Oscar Wilde put it "I can resist everything but temptation."

Aiyee Mercuryeee!!!

He's back. That pesky little Mercury retrograde. This time he appears October 12 in the sign of Scorpio [shudder] and moves to Libra October 23. The question while he is retrograde in Scorpio is " how long can I hang in here before something changes?" When he shifts to Libra it is all about relationships, good bad or indifferent and where they need to be transformed. It may be that you have had it and now is the time to know that, or you are in for the long haul and will be working on things until April 2008. If you are not in a relationship now is NOT the time to start one. Mercury will clear his retrograde shadow November 17 when someone from your past may show up. That indicates a need for healing, if you are willing. The physical influence with Mercury retrograde is the emphasis on road safety . Mercury rules automobile travel. Be cautious. Having said all that we have to contend with the Super Moon . That is the full moon of October 26 when the Moon is closer to the Earth than at any other time during the year. This is your big chance to resolve partnership stuff connected with money and power. There, aren't you glad you read this Blog? Now you can give yourself permission to say no to whatever you want because it's just too dangerous out there. Until November 17 anyway. Stay safe and sane and watch out for falling objects!

Never Good Enough

I have received a negative comment from one of my readers that my little essays could be more informative and of more help healthwise as I have put a lot of time into learning alternative ways of healing both mind and body. My objection to writing about this in a teaching sort of way is that I am not qualified to give anyone information other than, "I had that whatever it was and this remedy helped me." I was only involved in this stuff because I thought there had to be a gentler way for my children to be treated when they were sick. Once that idea entered my head I seemed to fall over lots of alternative ways of maintaining health. It was meant to be. Besides doctors scare me. What the information I acquired was never meant to be was a way to earn a living or even something to write about other than my adventures with it. Follow at your own peril. The whole point of this blogging lark is to have a laugh myself over the vagaries of life and maybe to raise a smile from you, gentle reader. I hope that satisfies my critic. If the universe had wanted me to impart knowledge to people it would have made me an academic but it didn't, so we are just going to have to live with it. Comments eagerly awaited.

La Nuit Blanche

Toronto recently had her second 'nuit blanche' with all sorts of artistic delights open to the public. I myself did not attend as I experience' nuit blanche' on a weekly basis without having to trundle down to the Big Smoke either. I am talking about good old white nights where one snaps awake at three in the morning and that's it. It's wakey wakey until the birds start singing. So what? I can hear you say. Put on the light and read. I would if I could but I am too tired. That is the worst of it. You are so tired you can do nothing but lie there, and think. All sorts of wonderful castles in Spain are built after three a.m. Paintings to be painted, stories to be written, poetry to be scanned all while I am so tired I can't even open my eyes in the dark. The next morning I try to remember this stuff that seemed so great in the wee smalls and it's pedestrian to say the least. Besides I'm too tired next morning to do anything anyway. I have given up caffeine, eat well before 8 o'clock, and stay away from carbs at night but nothing makes the slightest bit of difference. Goodness I am tired!

Recovery Mode

We have survived the Mongolian Death Flu and I am now able to take pen in hand and resume my duties. I find as usual it is not the physical symptoms that are so distressing, though this whatever it was, was rather nasty but the emotional furor that accompanies these miseries that we go through. When I was a young thing I would get sick, suffer the torments then get over it. That all changed in my mid thirties when I realized that the real distress was mental . It was if my mind was in control of me, not me it. No matter how my body was paining me my thoughts were the real torment. It has taken me a long time to figure this out, [ I can hear that slow learner comment, thank you very much !] Once I accepted the idea that most illness has an emotional origin [ I don't include karmic in with this ] it became clearer and clearer that our reaction to the stress in our lives, even happy stress is to sometimes fall ill and, in that state of mental torment that the illness brings with it is the clue to what fear we hold that needs to be healed. It is always a paradox to me and this one is that the more you look inward the clearer the outward view becomes. Of course being a slow learner I am not sure yet what the secret of this flu holds for me but I see now from writing this that the emotional component was not a big factor in this episode and perhaps I just needed a couple of days in bed with a roaring temperature to clear away a few physical cobwebs. So there we are. It is all a mystery!

I'll Be Bach

Last night was what the Russians call a white night. In normal English I couldn't sleep. Normally I just lie there gnashing my teeth or read if it's not too much effort. Last night was different. All sorts of creative ideas wandered through my brain though I was too tired to do anything but admire them. One of the musings was over accents which is interesting as this morning I recieved an email on that very thing.

"Most of the reported disparity between the English accents is purely a product of social conditioning... a Cockney chooses to speak the way he does because of his surroundings and upringing.... They may not hear the difference but they certainly have the necessary apparatus to produce them; all of them having tongues and quite a few having teeth."

I was mulling over this very thing last night though not in quite so sarky a manner. I have lived with the Austrian lo these many years and it was just a couple of years ago that we found out the man had no idea he had an accent ! We were watching him give an interview on t.v. which he does now and again. We were very proud. In the middle of the program he jumped to his feet and exclaimed in horror " I have an accent!" and left the room. We were stunned. Of course he has an accent. He's Austrian. But it seems that people are perhaps not really aware of themselves as Anthony Burgess says in the above quote. I myself am very aware of my English accent when I speak German as the Austrians make sure I understand . The hooting and sniggering can be demoralizing if you let it ; but I soldier on regardless. It seems Canadians are a politer lot as my poor Austrian found out when he saw himself on the little screen. He must be conditioned to the heckling way that people are corrected in his homeland. I wouldn't have him change his speech for the world. It's adorable. My very own Arnold!

Step and Fetchit if You Can

We are back from our holiday by the lake. It was very pleasant and lovely on the beach though I managed to wrench my arm swimming in rough water. I now have a duff shoulder to go with my gammy leg. They are both on the right side which means I am nicely balanced. The problem arises now when we are out in the car. The better half has a frozen shoulder so I have become designated driver for the last six months. Now we have to flip a coin to see who loses and gets to agonize over the gearshift. I can hear a chorus of why don't you walk? Would that I could . Gammy leg, remember? I am doing the male thing and ignoring it until it either falls off or gets better. I don't much care at this point what happens as long as there is no mess involved. The newest tiny baby was seen quickly on our way home and looks now very much like his mother. He is still quite tiny but as newborns go is BIG! Tonight we go down to visit the skybox with the million dollar view where number three child has parked herself. I must bring my camera. It is on the 14th floor. Just thinking about it makes me ill. The balcony and I will forever remain strangers. The day I found out that high buildings sway in the wind was the day I vowed to stay as near terra firma as much as humanly possible. If it wasn't for the fact that I am related to the proud tenant of this place nothing would get me up there. I am wondering how the cat is doing and if he knows he has left Earth forever. Poor beast. Must go and rest my limbs in case the quarter lets me down.

I Have Spam

Here was me thinking that this blog is just a way to vent in a slightly sarcastic manner or to bump up my typing skills when lo and behold I get blog spam[ couldn't read it as it was in Portuguese but it's the thought that counts ] and not only do the dedicated readers leave comments [ thank you both] I have an anonymous comment! Can life get any better? Apparently it can, as Little Jakey put in a belated appearance this Thursday. We now have three tiny grandsons , two of them born in the same year. Sadly we are going on a long planned week's holiday so the tiniest baby will be a week older when I see him again. The two older tinies are off the coast of Vancouver Island so they have not been seen by us since August 17. They will be BIG when they come back the end of September. I have acquired a new hobbby which is trolling for really good children's books. The main criterion is the drawings. If the story is good but the pictures are duff then we don't want it. Most of them are on my bookshelf waiting for little people to come visit. Some get given to the tinies but I am hoping to lure them up here with stories! And lovely cakes that are sugar free. Don't scoff it can be done. I will save that for another day.

The End of Venus

We have been going through yet another retrograde. This time it is a Venus one which has to do with love objects; those with a pulse and those without. I myself found it a time of confusion. Let me give you an example. I went to gas up the car which I have been doing for most of my adult life. Could I get the car on the right side of the pumps ? I could not. Round the islands I went each time with the gas tank on the wrong side. Talk about dyslexic! If anyone had been watching they would have laughed. Maybe they were, I was too upset to notice. How Venus comes into this is we need to really focus in her retrograde on what is dear to our hearts and what we love to do and who we love to be with. If there is friction in any of these areas it is asking for us to do some repair work on ourselves. "What is true. What is not true. What can never be true." is how my astrologer put it. The end of the Venus retrograde is August 27 though the energy lingers into the beginning of September. In this time we are to let go with love those people in our lives who need to be free of us and we of them. Tall order, as our egos fight to hang on to the safe and familiar. That sentence was remarkably hard to write. Poor little ego is hanging on for dear life! I am not sure when the next cosmic hoohaa erupts but I will keep you posted. The computer is misbehaving and as I have neither the skill nor the patience to deal with it this little blog will come to an end.

It's Out There Somewhere

We are apartment hunting. In the Big Smoke. This has been a dream of mine for a long time to have a little flat in Toronto where I could live over the winter, go back to school part time , maybe find a little part time job. So I have been looking and looking and looking. The rents are atrocious and there is very little available for when we want it. So discouraging. However I refuse to give up. There is an apartment out there with our name on the letterbox , I just haven't found it yet. The nicest apartment of all is an old brownstone on Broadview Ave. that I have had my eye on for a couple of years. I have been inside just the once but that was enough for me. This is the place. Well it seems others think so too as nothing is free for Oct. 1 my personal move in day. Today I am going to look at yet another 1960's high rise. They show me places on the gazillionth floor and I come over faint just looking out the window. The balcony would be an undiscovered land as far as I am concerned. Of course the Better Half is hanging over and swaying in the breeze and saying,
"Mm, quite the view!''
Then there is the cat to be considered. Lots of places don't want animals even though that is against the law in Ontario. We don't want to be where we are not welcome whether we have two legs or four. So I am asking your help [you faithful few who read this] in asking the universe to come through for me and mine and helping direct us to the right place. Thank you.

Death Throes in the Garden

I wrote earlier on about the drought we are having here in Aurora and how there has been a total water ban for weeks now. Well as soon as everything died the ban was lifted and we are now allowed to water the corpses. Which I am doing. I hear the rattle of their little skeleton stalks as I refresh them. The weeds are doing very well. At least there is something green in my garden. Of course the zucchini are still going strong, I doubt that radiation would stop them . The whole neighbourhood is eating the damn things. People stand behind their curtains and pretend they are not home when I come to call with a green torpedo in each hand. Every year I am determined to plant flowers instead of veg but the lure of the little pots of tomatoes, cukes beans etc. is just too much for me and I am cast under their tiny spell. Each year is the same. I grow enough green stuff for an army and who to give it to? There are only two of us here and I point blank refuse to eat vegetables for breakfast no matter how healthy it may be. I must meditate on the matter this winter. Perhaps a small orchard would be the answer but it takes some time for trees to fruit and we are tossing around the idea of going out west when his nibs retires. While I can take cuttings and bulbs with me to B.C. I can hardly lug fruit trees out there now can I ? It is said that gardening is very good for your health but I find the stress and worry of it all far outweighs the benefits. I need another hobby.

We're Baaaack!

Actually we have been back for a while. The holiday was a bust. It was a dismal damp campsite and then I got sick so back we came . The better half enjoyed his time off work in the comfort of his own home. I am still waiting for a holiday but live in hope for the second installment in September. So far a bit of discussion about where to go for the next two weeks but not much enthusiasm from either of us. What I would really like to do is go white water rafting but hate the thought of driving all the way to Ottawa. Perhaps I should grasp the nettle with both hands and hop on a Porter plane and half an hour later step off the machine at Uplands Airport. I am sure it would cost about the same as a tank of gas. Ah, had I but the courage. Of course there is always Adavan but I doubt that would be strong enough. One day there will be a compelling reason for me to look my fear in the eye and get on a plane and in doing so perhaps lose the fear. That's the theory anyway so I'll just leave it at that. What I find odd is that it is far more dangerous to step into a raft on the Ottawa River than it is to step onto a plane but I have no fear whatsoever of the rafting. Only goes to show how the mind can count for very little. Perhaps one day I'll lose mine and sally forth to all the wonderful places I have longed to go. The irony of that is mad people are not allowed on planes. A slow boat to China it is then. All we need to worry about is how we'll breath when we get there.

Up Up and Away

I am off on my holidays for two weeks. Nothing too thrilling just some time by the water and no sights or sounds but natural ones God willing. The organizing of this project is formidable but my better half takes care of all the finer points. I have a tendency to throw everything I can think of AT THAT MOMENT into a case and off we go. Problems arise when the moments following that moment surface and I begin to see that some long range planning might have come in handy. I just want to GO! Now that I am fast approaching my dotage I have seen the beauty of lists. Just sit quietly with a cup of tea and write down what you want to accomplish in the day. Keep the list handy and cross things off as they are done. Works for me in spite of the mocking voices in the background. I managed to get through the Mercury rerograde unharmed and I am sure my list making had something to do with it. Speaking of retrogrades we are headed for a Venus one July 27 so there goes the love life. "What love life" I hear faintly in the distance. Well we all have something or someone or many somethings or someones that we love and they will come up for overhaul then. You have been warned. Back in two weeks.

The Rain it Raineth Not

We are suffering here in Aurora-where everything is blessed- from a drought. There is a total water ban and the gardens look pitiful. I have to water the vegetable patch with a watering can and it takes forever, also one arm looks rather longer than the other. There is rain due this week but I have my doubts that it will be enough. I pulled a poor little dahlia that I had got for Mother's Day out of the dust. I stuck its little tubers overnight in a pail of water and repotted it in among the vegetables where it will be watered for sure. There doesn't seem to be anything more I can do for the poor things but carry around watering cans and wait for the heavens to open. We have had dry spells before but never a total watering ban like this. I'm hearing strange things about the weather in B.C. When I was there last year the small fish that the seals and sea birds feed on had not arrived so they where all starving. It was early spring so they would have had offspring to feed. It seems that climate change is here with a vengence and whether or not it is a cycle that the Earth goes through if we were here or not, it seems good Karma to be as kind to all living things as possible. With that in mind I will continue my rounds with the watering can and if my arms are a little longer at the end of it all, it is in a good cause.

Our Pal Al

I got an email from Al Gore this week. I was a little startled to find it. Of course it was a forward through my political action group but still, I lead a quiet life and it's nice for someone to say thank you now and again. I mentioned it to three people and they seemed less than impressed. Two were by email and it could be that it never reached them. The other I spoke to and she was really keen on sharing the joy of new bathroom wallpaper. Perhaps there are people who have even quieter lives than I do. The Mercury journal is taking shape. I have had time to reflect on the upheavals going on around me and see over and over again that we just cannot get out of our own way. We set stuff up, loved ones get annoyed with us and then we feel badly done by. On a larger scale we can see this stuff in the street racers, young men full of the joys of spring tra la, and there they are in the arms of the law accused of vehicular manslaughter and some poor soul driving along wondering if he'll ever get his mortgage paid off and maybe it would be nice to go out for fish and chips for supper ends up dead in a ditch. This in all fairness was the last thing the young men intended I'm sure, but you see the point is if we are so oblivious to our own behavior then we not only hurt ourselves we hurt others. The paradox being here that the more we look inward the clearer the outward view. The universe is relentless, if we don't notice the nudge eventually that piano will drop. Perhaps this should have gone in my journal it's distinctly lacking in humour and has very little to do with our pal Al. As Susan used to say "It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye and then it's a sport!" By the way someone called Haganrihi left me a message. Who are you?

Mercury Madness Again

Not one to belabour a point_is that laughter I hear?_ but I have more to offer on the dreaded Mercury retrograde. You remember? It's the time when communications get all snarled. Well this time it is messing with our feelings as it's in the house of Cancer [all about emotion] and the Gemini new moon is adding to the horror, so anyone born under the signs of Virgo or Gemini which Mercury rules are in for a bucketful. If you want some really good info I can recommend an astrologer. It was suggested to me to keep a journal of this time as it would make really good reading once it's over. So I am . Keeping a journal that is, and yes the madness has started. Misunderstandings are rampant and the grief over them is fascinating to see . There is also a lot of rehashing along the lines of could've ,should've , you get the picture . Never fear it will all end soon and then we are in for another bash come November when dear little Mercury is in Scorpio which as we all know is about keeping secrets and lashing out in a nasty scuttling sort of way. Can't wait.

If At First You Don't etc.

I have been wracking my brain , what's left of it , for this wretched blog as I had promised myself to write at least once a week. There have been numerous starts and just as numerous deletes but I am determined even if it is more than the usual load of twaddle that I will do this, so help me ...
Perhaps it has something to do with the Mercury retrograde that is befogging my mind and causing some very interesting miscommunications. The cursed thing is in it's shadow and due to drop on us full throttle June15. Unfortunately we booked a holiday on the weekend so I am a little concerned as to what I might find when I get to my destination, if I get to my destination. I have a squeaky clutch pedal so if I am smart I'll get that seen to before I sally forth. The holiday begins July 16 and the retrograde ends July15 but there will still be lingering energy I'm sure. There is also connected to this Mercury energy a chance to put things right in relationships as old grievences air themselves. Unfortunately most people are resentful of these opportunities and blow hooeys, using the chance to proclaim themselves victim yet again! Only children and those with truly no power are victims. The rest of us are, if we have any honesty at all, fully aware of our part in all of our little dramas even if we choose to ignore it. I'm starting to get preachy and that won't do! Just use this time as a blessing from the Universe and when the piano does fall on your head your last conscious thought can be before you succumb to your injuries "What a gift from the Universe, now it's really got my attention!" I wish you well and a safe, speedy and fruitful journey from the 15 to the 15.

No Time Like the Present or Future

I have been away from my desk the last few days as the garden has been calling me and it has a very loud voice. I have a shade garden, herbaceous borders, two front gardens and a vegetable patch, as well as various planters and window boxes. It's made me tired to write never mind looking after it all. My strong right arm has developed a strange pain in guess what? his right arm which needs lots of rest and bi-weekly physio visits. How unfortunate and just in time for the summer! So add to my list of to-doos, grass cutting. Not to worry, it is all a blessing if you look at it the right way. First of all there is that lovely fresh air only slightly tainted with smog, we are in Aurora after all. Sunshine is also free just don't overdo it, skin cancer and cataracts come lightly to mind. There is also the pleasure of sitting in the garden enjoying the breeze and the scent of the lilac and lily of the valley which were beautiful this year. The strong right arm is very happy to help in garden appreciation it's one of his finer qualities. I shouldn't make too much mock of this, the poor man has to be driven everywhere as we have a car with a shift and his nerves are just shot to pieces so he really does need the garden. This week a new bed has to be put in as the perennials are bulging at the seams and then there is the herb patch that has to be transplanted,I could go on and on and on...Oh I forgot it's all exercise and add to that my trips to the gym, well I'm just too fit for words! The best is last as strong right arm has a perfectly good left arm and has offered-wait for it -to WEED! Now there is a job I detest so it has all worked out very well. The Universe wasn't laughing at me after all.

The Cat Wears Prada

I vowed a few weeks ago not to write about my cat as not everyone finds her as endearing as I do especially my son in law whom I suspect is a dog fancier. I had that feeling when I watched him try to get Nigel( the cat before this one) to fetch a ball and jump over a stick. Here is a man who needs a dog I thought, though now that I know him better perhaps he was trying to make the point that cats are useless, which brings me back to Kathleen. She basically is useless. She has no working skills whatsoever except to kill animals smaller than herself. Right now she is trying desperately to nab a squirrel that can outwit her every move. She stalks birds ,bees, and flies. No kills yet. She watches the tray of the printer and when I fire it up she does her damndest to snag the thingy inside going back and forth. She walks over the keyboard when I am typing and so far has pulled down the living room curtains twice. Flies again. We have had a problem with mice this winter and when Kathleen came along I was sure that was the end of that, but no. There was absolutely no interest shown in indoor killing activities and so to the hardware store I went for mouse bait. She's just a pretty face our Kathleen and the best little groomer on the block. No unkempt coat for her, what would the squirrels think?

The Return of the Dreaded Mercury

We are having another Mercury retrograde June 15 so prepare for your computer to fritz, your car to stall, and what you said to be taken the wrong way. The blasted thing lasts through the summer so stay off airplanes, meaning me. It can be moderated somewhat with the energy of the Gemini new moon June 14. One is supposed to stay focused on the positive aspects of one's life and work with the Law of Attraction so don't expect your e-mail to fly off into the unknown when you send it and perhaps it won't, though I don't need a Mercury retrograde for that to happen. The whole purpose of this is to clear out clutter, mental and otherwise. Maybe start with a closet or two. I have no problem chucking stuff out even other peoples -you know who you are -but the clutter in my mind is something else altogether. Negative thoughts, blame, all that delicious way of dodging responsibility I find really easy. I suspect that all has to go, along with the dust bunnies under the bed. Well we can only give things our best shot and forewarned is forearmed so don't blame me if it all goes pear shaped. You have been told!

Hivy Divy Doo

I have just found out to my astonishment that my recurring hives are due to weak adrenal glands and not an overstressed liver as I had been told. For the last two years I have been treating my liver with the greatest respect and all for naught hive wise. I feel like a long walk straight to the liquor store and damn the consequences. Now I have to find yummy things like nettles to eat and drink to keep the poor pooched adrenals afloat for a few more years. Life gets more and more like a jigsaw puzzle and there are sooo many pieces but they do fit if you have the patience to put the information together. Trouble is I was standing behind the door when patience was being handed out. Enough about my puds. There is nothing so dull as other peoples' ailments unless it is other peoples' dreams. I am off now to ransack the tea cupboard for nettle tea though lord knows how long it has been sitting there.

When you wish upon a star

I just got an e-mail from my astrologer. She is asking people to make a wish on Venus the evening star that starts to shine at dusk in the north east sky. Dale says that if you are clear in your mind about what you want and need and are looking beyond blaming others for the lack in your life then your dreams will manifest in this world and you will be living them by 2008 at the latest. So I am wishing away, and what I am wishing for is a studio of my very own where I can be as smelly as I like with the turps and linseed oil and there is no one to go '' Oh what ever is that dreadful pong for God's sake open a window!"Nor will small people be allowed in other than under the strictest supervision; now that we have two small people in our world again with another due shortly. I tried with the best of intentions to incoporate small types into my art projects but you need the eyes of a hawk to prevent damage, and the patience of Job [ neither of which I have] to not mind the embellishments added to your objets d'art as they sit drying. A sunny warm cheap space just for yours truly where the only one to mind the smell or the mess is ME. I can't imagine anything finer than getting up in the morning and going to the studio. I'll probably spend as much time staring at a blank canvas there as I do in my little back room here but I am willing to give it a shot.

Lists

Yes I know it's been a while but I have been busy. We have a new addition to our family and we were all focused on welcoming him to the world. Now that things have settled somewhat and neglected household chores have been seen to I have some free time on my hands to devote to the "Arts" ehhew! What I had in mind to write about was lists and my obsession with them though I don't feel it is an obsession which is what it has been referred to by" he who is nameless." I think of lists as a very necessary part of life. When I get up in the morning and throughout the day I make myself lists of what needs to be done and then I do it or as much or little of it as I feel can be got away with. The big thrill is crossing off the stuff done. It is an illusion really as it makes my life look jam packed with interesting stuff when in reality it is pretty dull and much of the time boring but that's my problem not yours. To be honest I don't think I can handle too much excitement; look at what happened when I attended my little grandson's birth, I was a mass of hives the next day which leads back to the lists. They let you off the hook a bit with stress as the list seems to show an orderly life and as I don't handle stress well[see hives]I need all the help I can get. We won't go into astrological signs and lists as that is a blog all to itself but suffice to say they have a bearing on it. More about Virgoes next time.

Blank Pages

Sue Townsend who wrote the Adrian Mole books once said that writing was sitting staring at a blank page until your forehead started to bleed. I know now what she meant. Now that I have a public following (all four of you ) who I envision waiting with baited breath for my next posting, my mind has gone completely blank. When no one knew or cared about the stories I was spinning all the time in my head ( they still may not for all the feedback I get - you know who you are!) there was constant rubbish just on the boil all the time. Now that I have to greet a blank computer screen the ideas have all floated out my left ear. To be brutally honest the real joy in this appalling task I've set myself is to re-read my twaddle and edit it . Now that is a pleasure. One always knows where one is with grammar. All those dreadful years teaching have left a mark. I am never happier it seems than when I am waving a red pen around. Oh yes for those of you who care, little Edward is back in the Smoke with his Mummy. The reasons why will be left for another day. I'm exhausted.

Edward

The new cat is here. His name (so far) is Edward and Kathleen hates him. There is a lot of low moaning and hissing going on but little Edward is not taking a blind bit of notice. He truly is little, only eight weeks old and still squeaking and looking around likely corners for Mother. A little ball of black and white fluff that is hated with a passion. Had I known Kathleen would have carried on so I would have saved myself the bother. As it is I am up at six every morning as Edward can only be alone when he is sleeping. It's been thirty years since I've had such a little kitten. I must have forgotten that part. We will soldier on for a week and if things don't improve, back the boy goes to Mother. She forgot to say goodbye to him. When last he saw her she was very busy licking a paw and making sure to do a complete job of it. I don't know if little Edward will even be welcome ,but the two- leggeds want him back if adjustments just cannot be made here. I want to report that Ted, an elderly ill cat of a friend is doing much, much better since he was treated on the Scio bio energetics machine. His appetite has returned, his fur has grown back and he is able to get upstairs to watch the hockey games once more. He's a Leafs fan. Maybe that had something to do with it. Have to go check on Edward. It's very quiet up there. I hope she hasn't eaten him!

Spam, Glorious Spam!

Today I would like to address the issue of spam. I thought spam was something disgusting that had once been an animal and came out of a tin but now I know better. Ever since I opened this blogging thingy I have been the unfortunate recipient of frightful begging messages. They run from ex American soldiers in dire need of my financial help to illiterate notes from African solicitors wanting me to help them launder gazzillions of dollars (always U.S.) I would open these things up and have a good laugh but then I found out the laugh was on me. I was told if this stuff was opened, especially the web sites, I was running the risk of being hacked and my bank account evaporating. Well I 'm not an idiot so now I don't read the stories when they come. I miss them . There was always the opportunity for a laugh. Now I have to be all serious and responsible and delete them. I liked spam better when I thought it came out of a can.

Kathleen the Killer Kat

We have a little cat named Kathleen. She came to us in the New Year courtesy of the streets of Toronto and was small and anguished. Well she's twice the size now and confident enough to be left on her own for a few hours without having a meltdown. Since the nice weather arrived Kathleen has ventured outside a few times and discovered birds and squirrels. As she is a leaping,climbing sort of cat this has brought a whole new meaning to life. I was hoping for a greater interest in mice but it seems not. Her first near miss was a black squirrel her own size who got away by the skin of his chinny- chin- chin and spent a good ten minutes up a tree complaining about it all. So far no kills but I fear for the livestock around here and I expect to be hearing from the neighbours as well. Kathleen has little respect for boundaries. Fences are to be climbed and hedges to be crawled through. I have been looking around for a little brother for her which might keep her in the house more as she would have someone to play with besides me. I have my limits, teeth and claws hurt. This would unfortunately double the killing capacity once Bro was old enough to go out. On the horns of a dilemma once again.

the times they are a changin'

I have noticed that when I post a paragraph that my good evening or good morning makes no sense if you look at the time posted. As I write this the time is 9:25 however I have no idea what the time posted will be. Could anyone clarify that for me. On to more interesting matters. I said I was going to write about bio energetics but for some reason I am being asked not to put my experiences in print. When that changes I will be happy to share with you the amazing healing I experienced with this machine. What I can share with you is a suggestion by the Scio [the machine] that I start using Bach Flower remedies specifically Mimulus and Agrimony. I started with them on the week-end and by Monday lunchtime I was having a full blown homeopathic crisis. My stomach hurt, my head hurt ;I felt wretched. As I said before in a previous note this is how we heal. We get sick from the outside in and we heal from the inside out. By Monday evening I felt really well and full of energy. The timing could have been bettter though as I would have liked to have gone to sleep before midnight. The feeling of oppression and darkness hanging over me that has been present since my Dad died in January has lifted and I feel now that the way ahead has been cleared. I will continue with the Flower remedies for a while longer but reduce the dosage as I am sure there is more old stuff waiting to be released and I don't want to be too hard on myself. Enough for today, something lighter next time!

Neous sees the world.

Good Evening ! as Alfred Hitchcock used to say when he meant nothing of the kind. However I do wish you all a good evening all two of you who I know are reading this, and many of them. On to Neous. Neous is my youngest daughter's little cat. She had a yearning to see more of the world and slipped out unseen when Hannah was at the apartment door. There was a hue and cry the next day when tiny Elvis her faithful companion turned up for his Fancy Feast alone. The apartment was searched, no nook or cranny untouched. No Neous. Posters were written and in the process of putting them up Neous was found shivering in a stairwell and very happy to be taken home and fed. How she got where she did is forever a mystery as Neous's lips are sealed. A tiny Hitchcockian mystery with a happy ending.

Aftermath

Good afternoon one and all,
Woke up this morning feeling like a poisoned parrot due to a very thorough bio energetics treatment the day before. I receive a treatment once a month sort of like a tune up for a car and as I am more of a Ferrari I require frequent tuneups to keep me in running order. Naturopathic treatments can leave you feeling rough, as can Reiki , chiropractic, etc. because the body releases stored toxins. You just have to drink a fair bit of water to flush them out and move around in a gentle fashion as the liver loves movement and it is the liver processing the waste matter that is making you feel punky. Once the sludge is gone you feel great and full of energy. Not everyone goes through this of course. Some folk are made of stronger stuff and feel great right off the bat but sadly, not me. My next epistle will give more information on bio enegetics as it was this form of energy healing that allowed my heart to recover from congestive heart failure. Until then goodbye from me to you.

The Astrologer

Last week I was given an astrological reading by a very adept astrologer named Dale Osdachuk. She predicted 9/11. She is now seeing a configuration in the stars that has not been seen since the first millennium A.D. There is a correlation between these astrological signs and the last years of the Mayan Calendar. More to follow...